Letter 29: The Star Within Ourselves
Letter 29: The Star Within Ourselves
When we marvel
Happy Wednesday! We’re so happy to have a new contributor (and another of Emily’s former students!), Anna Fry, with us today.
One of my favorite poems is Walt Whitman’s “Song of Myself,” in which he writes,
“I celebrate myself, and sing myself,
And what I assume you shall assume,
For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.”
As I read Anna’s letter, I couldn’t help but recognize the similarities in Uncle Walt’s and Anna’s words and sentiment about our individual journeys toward loving ourselves.
There’s not much more I can say to add to Anna’s lovely piece, so I will leave it there. I know you’ll love Anna’s heart and message. So here’s to embracing our own “perfect balance” and discovering that we—as we currently are—are exactly who we should be. —Emily
From “A Star in Perfect Balance”
by Kourtney Nichole
“Seek the stars” you say.
The only way to get anywhere better is to reach for something unrealistic, right?
So, I set off.
My dirty white tennis shoes tread through a thick batter of mud. […]
Mud is up to my knees… and just when I think I’m stuck —
I’m at the top of the world.
A single mountain, home to the wild, is now mine.
I am alone, yet at the same time, in perfect company.
5,000 stars with no place to be, settle their gaze on me. […]
Just like the stars,
I am in constant conflict with myself.
But what you might not realize?
I am the star in perfect balance.
I am content.
I am life.
Did you know that stars are in constant conflict with themselves? The mass of a star is so large that this gravity pulls it inward, and would continue to collapse for millions of years if it were not for a certain contrary pressure that pushes against this gravitational collapse of the star. That pressure is light. At the core of a star, there is an incredible amount of energy, and light makes its way to the surface. With this push and pull of gravity and light, a star is in perfect balance.
I have loved stars for a long time now. When this fascination started I cannot be sure, but all I know is that I own a lot of star earrings. Stars truly baffle me. We simply look up into the night sky and see balls of gas emitting light and heat that are billions, yes billions, of miles away. How freaking insane is that?
Not only are stars above us, but the shape is everywhere.
I draw stars on the corner of the health assessment notes I am supposed to be studying. I fiddle with the shape connected to a chain around my neck or in my ears. We see them fashionably patterned on a Target sweater. Then we view stars as a word to name people. We might proclaim, “So-and-So is my favorite Hollywood star.”
The author of the poem above is not someone famous we study in our high school English classes. She seems to be a perfectly ordinary writer based in Seattle, but her words are profound. Nichole was told to go out and find the stars, encouraged to go for the impossible. The journey is difficult, but in the end, she discovers who she is.
She does not need to “seek the stars” because she realizes that she is the star.
We can place ourselves into this poem—imagining the feeling of experiencing coming into our true selves. The author’s words explain those emotions beautifully.
We all have dreams for our lives—stars. We create fantasies we have no intention to pursue. But what if one day we did? What if one day we decided the time is now to follow a path we never thought we could go down? Just as the author writes about cheers to do this for “those who cannot,” what if we were the different ones?
This is the hard truth: the trek to seeing the beauty within ourselves is not easy. We will fall and get stuck. Others may drag us down, but there will be people that can urge us on towards the stars. And once we reach them, we will realize that our dreams were never truly the stars… we are. What brings us to this point are our hearts, minds, and souls working in perfect harmony together, and they continue to keep us in this equilibrium.
We are human, simply human. However, there is nothing simple about us on the inside. We have a nervous system functioning alongside our respiratory system that operates with our circulatory system, and on and on. Humans feel and experience. We are joined with ourselves and with others. Our minds and heart battle each other sometimes, but these conflicts make us who we are. Humans can sense and touch and hear. Isn’t this wonderful?
I urge us all to continue to dive deeper into ourselves—loving who we are and how we were created to be, experiencing life, and being life. Let us understand and cherish that the push and pull within ourselves allows us to be just like the stars—in perfect balance.
Anna’s Five Favorite Things
The necklace I mentioned in my piece was given to me as a birthday present from my boyfriend, and I haven’t taken it off since… except to shower, of course. This rose gold star pendant necklace is from Kendra Scott, looks good with any outfit, and has a texture that makes it extra sparkly.
I have been getting into more hair products recently, and the Dae prickly pear hair oil is one of my favorites. This product smells amazing and leaves my hair looking healthier and brighter. Plus, Dae is a woman-owned business which makes me love all their products even more.
Clay Lab Designs is a small business from Dallas, Texas, that I was lucky to encounter on the 4th of July at a vendor pop-up. Their earrings are so unique and fun. I bought a pair, and they are my new favorite earrings to wear right now for sure.
My boyfriend and I just tried this chocolate chip cookie recipe, and when I say they were some of the best ones I’ve had… I mean it. One batch made over two dozen cookies. They were extremely tasty. I didn’t want to stop eating them.
I recently came across a song titled “The Last Song on Earth” by Adam Melchor and Emily Warren. This track beautifully captures what I believe to be the confusing feelings of 2020 as a whole. Not only are Melchor and Warren’s harmonies incredible, but their lyrics make me think about all the events and emotions that happened to us last year. Truly powerful.
With gratitude,
Anna Fry
P.S. What are some experiences that make you feel like you are in perfect balance?
